Sleep deprivation and late nights browsing the internet lead you to plenty of interesting places. Here are my deep thoughts from the overnight shift:
1. Beware the guy that calls you crazy
I just got done reading this article. It's long, but it is a must read. The short version is: two different women write in to say that there is a creeper in their circle of friends. He makes inappropriate sexual comments or advances at the girls in the group, and makes the girls feel uncomfortable. Rather than come to their aid and banish this guy, the men in their group (including their significant others) use a variant of the "girl, you crazy" shtick in order to minimize the legitimate concerns of the girl and stick up for the guy.
What follows is an analysis of our rape culture. How men, even normal non-rapist men, convince women to keep quiet about the sexual misconduct (it's harmless, you asked for it, you're overreacting, etc.), and thereby create a world in which acquaintance rapes happen all the time and are seldom reported. There's also this related piece about how not to be a creeper. Tell your friends. Even the not-creepy ones. (Because, as this follow-on article discusses, creepiness is subjective.)
2. Does supporting an Eagle Scout mean I don't support gay rights?
I woke up Saturday night with a flyer on my front door. It was from a local Eagle Scout candidate collecting school supply donations for a local children's shelter. It also mentioned a fundraiser, taking place at the nearby Chik-Fil-A where a portion of proceeds would help the shelter. Oy!
I am really conflicted on what to do here. On one hand, I was a proud Girl Scout so I support scouting in general. My fiancé (and all these Astronauts) are Eagle Scouts. Boy Scouts as an organization and as individuals have done plenty of good things. But. But but but. Their policy on gays is short sighted, its discriminatory, and it is sending a message to young boys that hate and discrimination are ok, and that what they could be feeling is wrong. I guess it's fitting that he's teamed up with Chik-Fil-A. (Not the main topic but here's my POV in brief: Cathy can have his opinions and he can give his money to whatever hateful organization. But if I buy from Chik-Fil-A then I'm helping fund an agenda I disagree with, and that's not ok.)
As for the children's shelter, I don't want to refuse to help them if I otherwise would because of the Boy Scout business, but would I? It's not like a person can support every charity because there are millions and I have not won the lottery recently. But might I have participated in this were it not for the politics? I don't know.
So what should I do? Ignore it? Make some kind of statement? Donate separately to the children's shelter? What would you do?
3. The Last Name Project
A joint project by two feminist bloggers: From Two to One and The Feminist Mystique. It will take me quite awhile to read through all the posts, which detail all the different factors of changing (or keeping) one's last name when getting married. It is complex, and concerns not just feminism, not just allegiance to one's old family or the founding of a new one but all of these things and more. It's about personal identity, societal expectations, familial expectations... possibly the entirety of what it's like to be a woman in modern times wrapped up in a single act (or decision not to act). I'll be changing my name when I get married, but that does not come without some fear, some sadness, some wonder. But that is for another day, another post.
I also love that these two bloggers are giving a new face to feminism. The stereotype of militant, man-hating, bra-burning is a terrible one. Women should be allowed to stand up for themselves and their rights without being demonized by men or mass media. It is possible to be intelligent, thoughtful, and even love a man while also being a feminist. And as From Two to One is demonstrating, you can even be a person of faith in a seemingly patriarchal religion and still be a feminist. Interesting.
And there you have it, some deep night-shift-brain thoughts. What do you think of these topics?